In this video message, we are exploring what happens when we don’t get what we need. It ends up being manipulation at its finest.
We have innate needs for relationships. Those relationships pour into our lives. When our needs go unnoticed, it sets us back, and we can feel our weaknesses.
“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit all who listen.”
In this message, we are focusing on “building others up according to their needs.”
Here are the needs of each temperament. If you haven’t taken the temperament assessment, you can take it here: https://www.headingwest.org/online/test.php.
Yellow Innate Needs: Sanguines (yellow)
Red Innate Needs (Cholerics)
Sense of Control
Credit for Work
Green Innate Needs: (Phlegmatics)
Feeling of Worth
Lack of Stress
Blue Innate Needs: (Melancholics)
Space and Silence
Manipulation – to influence, especially in an unfair manner
Red (Cholerics) Manipulate in ways of
Manipulate with tone and volume
Tone- Harsh or biting comments
Volume- Angry outburst, yelling.
Yellow (Sanguines) Manipulate in ways of
Manipulate with Charm and Flattery
Charm- Elaborating or exaggerating, being over the top
Flattery- Phony or excessive praise of others
Green (Phlegmatics) Manipulate in ways of
Manipulate with procrastination and stubbornness.
Procrastination- Delaying or ignoring responsibilities
Stubbornness- Reusing to converse or compromise.
Blue (Melancholics) Manipulate in ways of
Manipulate with moods and silence.
Moods- Being judgmental, critical, or self-deprecating
Silence- Being disengaged, unwilling to talk to or hear from others.
What happens when we are not getting those needs met? We begin to manipulate those we are in relationships with. What we are giving them is not healthy stuff. We manipulate to get our needs met.
In this message, you will walk away with these three things.
An awareness of our needs
Knowledge of how we act when our needs are not met.
An awareness of when we are manipulating so that we don’t drain those we are in relationships with.