Sarcasm is one of my love languages.
I’d love to say it stems from my wittiness, but the truth is, there is much more to it than that.
There are times that I use sarcasm just as a means of communication. Rarely WHEN I use it, am I consciously thinking about the what and why I said it. It just “comes out.” But sometimes when I use it, it brings much more harm than good.
One night at the end of a very long day, as I was leaving dinner with a friend, we were engaging in some back and forth banter.
We’d talked about some pretty intense things that evening . . . life, our journeys, the beautiful parts, and the hurdles that we are facing. It was a pretty intimate verbal exchange, and while that is the nature of my role as a pastor when I’m the one revealing intimate things, it perhaps pushes my comfort zone just a little. I like to be in full control of “how much” I reveal about myself, and that evening it was as if the barriers were down, and I let my friend see more of me than in hindsight I was comfortable with.
As the evening was drawing to a close, because I seem to like and try to get the last word, I offered a final remark.
It was said in jest with some laughing behind it. But – it was snarky. It was a pointed, snarky, sarcastic comment towards my friend and how they could be a “better” friend to me.
They simply heard the statement, we said goodbye, and I drove home.
On my drive, my heart kept telling me that what I had done was wrong.
My words had the potential to hurt my friend, and that is the absolute last thing I would ever want to do.
I’ve been blessed by some great relationships in my life, yet because in my humanity, I allow my sense of fear to sometimes cloud those relationships, I act out of less than desirable places.
The bottom line . . . I say stupid crap to try to “protect” myself from getting hurt.
I act out of fear rather than love.
I tell you this story because I doubt I am the only human on this planet that allows this to happen.
We are in the final week of our message series “Boundaries – Establishing Great Guardrails for Life.”
Yesterday we explored what boundaries we should put in place so that we have great, solid relationships.
This week we are going to finish the series by looking at the most important boundary/guardrail of all.
The guardrails we put around our hearts.
King Solomon said, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do stems from it.” (Proverbs 4:23)
If we take some time to observe what we say and what we do, I bet we will all find somethings that perhaps “come from us” that are less than desirable. (Like the snarky way I tried to hide my vulnerability from my friend).
What comes out of us, like snarky words, is a result of what and how we are allowing our hearts to be shaped and formed in our journeys.
We need to guard our hearts… for that is critical in shaping who we are.
Today, try to observe what “comes from” your heart.
Grace and Peace,
Andrea

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