We all get in “funks,” right? Where we see things with tainted eyes, distorting reality and we apply that colored lens into all that we do and see.
I hear from some now that it seems it is easier to slip into a “funk” because of the prolonged period of time we are spending in quarantine. We miss our friends, we miss our hobbies like sports, etc. We miss church. We miss a lot of things . . . yet, it is still so important that we socially distance and try to stop the spread of COVID-19.
Personally I’m getting better at recognizing when I’m in a “funk” and at least trying to figure out what it is that has pushed me to go there. Confession (with great vulnerability, so hold this loosely, please) but my funks are typically defined by some level of insecurity I’m wrestling with. I was recently talking about my “funk” with a friend, asking, “Why am I wrestling with this so much now? I thought I wrestled with this a long time ago and was over it by now.”
She replied, “It’s been a long time since you’ve been to the mountain.”
April 2019 I had the opportunity to be a part of some research with Johns Hopkins Medical School/Hospital. They were doing a clergy study and I was lucky enough to be accepted, it was a life-changing experience. A big part of the research was confronting the “lens” with which we see our reality and then changing that. During my meditation, I saw myself on top of a mountain and I was able to claim the promises of being a “beloved by God” while in that experience.
I was able to connect inward spiritually with God in a way that changed the entire way I saw myself. Rather than see with the lens of insecurities and inadequacies, I saw with grace and love. The meditation allowed me to get the energy needed from God, not from self, ego, or pride.
Richard Rohr writes, “It is God within us that loves God, so seek joy in God and peace within; seek to rest in the good, the true, and the beautiful. It is the only resting place that also allows us to bear the darkness. Hard and soft, difficult and easy, pain and ecstasy do not eliminate one another, but actually allow each other. They bow back and forth like dancers, although it is harder to bow to pain and failure. If you look inside every failure, there are signs of opportunity.
For some reason, we get our energy from dark clouds much more than silver linings.
True joy is harder to access and even harder to hold onto than anger or fear. If our soul is at rest in the comforting sweetness and softness of God, we can bear the hardness of life and see through failure. That’s why people in love have such an excess of energy for others. If our truth doesn’t set us free, it is not truth at all. If God cannot be rested in, God must not be much of a God at all.”
Can you meditate today and focus on connecting with that deep presence that lies within each of us? The presence that provides peace, love, wholeness, and grace?
That is our calling.
That also is a beautiful gift for each of us.
That is God.