Lies are the safest place to run.
“There’s a scene in the movie “Something’s Gotta Give” that simply and succinctly captures one reality about the truth. After catching the man she loves on a date with another woman, Diane Keaton is chased out of the restaurant by a guilty and distraught Jack Nicholson. When he finally stops her, he pleads, “I have never lied to you, I have always told you some version of the truth.” She replies, “The truth doesn’t have versions, okay?” And that’s the truth. The truth may have many sides to it. It may be complicated or hard to understand, but it exists… in one version. Yet, most of us have trouble with the truth. We may not be outright liars, but we certainly shade the truth to make it fit more comfortably into our lives-to keep it from disrupting anything from our careers to our relationships to our afternoons.”
Truth does not have versions. Yet, we find ourselves telling half-truths.
Half-truths are just the same as lies. In her research, Bella DePaulo, Ph.D. found that people lie in one in five of their daily interactions. One in five! That is HUGE! Why is it that we struggling telling the truth? Why do we create worlds around ourselves in which we only deal in partial-truths?
Perhaps because those are the safest places to reside.
In The Shack, part of the “stuff” Mack has to confront is that he has hidden inside lies most of his life. He lived with an abusive dad, poisoned the dad so that the dad would stop beating he and his mom, and then lived with that secret (lie).
Eventually, our secrets catch up to us, even if it is that they eat away at us from the inside.
When Mack confessed that to Papa, Papa responded, “You’re a survivor. Your daddy hurt you something fierce. Life hurt you. Lies are one of the easiest places for survivors to run. It gives you a sense of safety, a place where you only have to depend on yourself. But it is a dark place. BUT – are you willing to give up the power and safety it promises you?” (p. 187)
Lies are dark places, but they also provides places for us to run and hide.
“Lies are a little fortress; inside them you can feel safe and powerful. Through your little fortress of lies you try to run your life and manipulate others. But the fortress needs walls, so you build some. These are the justification for your lies. You know – like you are doing them to protect someone you love, to keep them from feeling pain. You do whatever you think will work, so that you feel ok about the lies.” (p. 187)
The bottom line, however, is that we tell lies not to protect others . . . we tell lies to protect ourselves.
When we STOP telling lies, we face our fear of coming out to the dark. In that light – we find healing, forgiveness, and love. It is a process . . . and it is real.
When we venture out of our darkness, we experience real life.
Faith does not grow in the house of certainty. Therefore, if we want to increase our faith and live full, abundant lives, we must stop hiding behind and inside lies.
31-32 Then Jesus turned to the Jews who had claimed to believe in him. “If you stick with this, living out what I tell you, you are my disciples for sure. Then you will experience for yourselves the truth, and the truth will free you.” John 8