It’s all about motive.

This week we’ve talked a lot about pleasing people, what that means, and how it changes us if we aren’t careful.

If you missed Sunday’s message – click here to check it out. It identified what people pleasing is, how we can stop it, and what our faith has to say about it.

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The bottom line, however, is that we must recognize that as we are in relationship together there will always be some element of our actions that are done to try to please people.

So how do we know the difference?

It boils down to our motives.

“Why are we choosing to do this action? Is it because we truly care about the other person and how this action might impact them? Or is it because we simply don’t want the conflict that might come if we say no?”

Morin in her book 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do writes that as we seek to make decisions we should ask ourselves these questions:

  1. If I choose to do this, what will I have to give up?
    2. What will “I” gain (note – not the other person) if I do this?
    3.  How will I feel after I do this?

If we find that we don’t have to make significant sacrifices to our own lives and our actions won’t be a detriment to ourselves, plus we will feel ok/fine after we do it and not exhausted or exasperated, then most likely it isn’t an issue of people pleasing.

As we conclude this week’s thoughts around people pleasing, what if we take the power that God has given us and realize that we’re not here to make everybody happy!?!?

What if we accept that we’re here to be who God has called and created us to be.

We EACH are wonderfully made and we don’t need to make anyone happy in order to live into that!

Thessalonians 2:4 For we speak as messengers approved by God to be entrusted with the Good News. Our purpose is to please God, not people. He alone examines the motives of our hearts.